Thanksgiving feels different - it's ok.

This picture means so much to me. It's a picture of my dad cutting the Thanksgiving Turkey in my parents house in New Port Richey, Florida and Campy waiting for pieces of Turkey to "accidentally" drop from the sky. It was my last Thanksgiving with my dad. 

My dad was diagnosed with stage IV metastatic cancer to his spine in June 2013. He had major spinal surgery a few weeks later and was not given a good diagnosis if he would ever walk again and the survival rate of this type of aggressive cancer was not good. My dad was fit, otherwise healthy and active. He was also very stubborn and positive. 

My dad worked extremely hard to learn how to walk again. After 3 months with a spine brace, wound vac and walker (and assistance with all daily activities) and loads of medications, radiation and chemo.....my dad continued improving his strength and was able to move around the house by Thanksgiving (November 2013) with his walker - all by himself. My dad passed away 3 days before my 32nd birthday in May 2014. My dad had a very tough 10-month fight with cancer. 

Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday. I realize that my 28-year vegetarian diet isn't best well suited for this annual meat-centered holiday but for me, it's not about the food. It's about family, gratitude, kindness and traditions, memories and stories. 

My dad prepared the Turkey but he would always make me an out-of-the-bird "vegetarian" stuffing. Ever since Campy came into our life (October 2008), my dad made sure that Campy always had a full belly of Turkey when it was time to eat the Thanksgiving meal. My dad had a special strategy of preparing the Turkey - cut of a piece for the plate, eat a small piece and toss a piece to Campy. As you can imagine, Campy loved this strategy. 

For me, every Thanksgiving has felt a little different since my dad passed away. 
I understand if you feel like Thanksgiving feels a little different this year. A day that we all associate with genuine feelings of gratitude will not include the typical deep-rooted camaraderie of gathering in person with loved ones and chosen family. Although eight months have passed since we were first hit with the devastating changes, stressors and adjustments that resulted from the deadly and highly contagious pandemic, nothing could have prepared us for the emotional toll of not being able to celebrate the holidays with our close friends and family.

Although restrictions on gatherings should be followed to protect you, your family and your community, there's something to be learned from this that can help us moving forward.

When we can once again hug, gather and enjoy the simple joy of traveling, don't take the special people in your life for granted. 

We are all energy. Be sure to surround yourself with people who bring out the best in you. 
The people you surround yourself with, you become. No matter your level of confidence or self-esteem, you are not immune to negative energy, destructive behaviors or bad influences.

This pandemic has taught us a lot. One of the many lessons we have learned is that our lives are not abundant without close connections to friends and family.

The world is not a random puzzle. There is meaning and purpose to every circumstance. 

Your mindset plays a very important role in life. The way you think about things and see the world determines how you live your life. If your mind is drawn toward the negative, you will feel hopeless. I encourage you to have an optimistic mind, full of gratitude, on this Thanksgiving holiday. This pandemic is forcing us to take a more holistic view of our personal choices. It may be incredibly hard to not think about ourselves as the US culture is known for individualism - our needs, our goals, our personal wants. My dad didn't pass away due to COVID but over 260,000 American lives have been taken due to this pandemic. On this Thanksgiving, we must all put our own wants and needs to the side in order to protect others - not just the vulnerable but all of the essential workers who are sacrificing so much to serve for others. 

I hope that you have plenty to be grateful for this year. I hope that you still have your health and have not caught this highly contagious virus. Our normally joyous holiday season is dominated by mandates, losses, uncertainty and social distancing. It's a bummer. It sucks. I encourage you to take some time to recognize what's good in your life. Even in the face of suffering and disappointment, find gratitude. 

With so many restrictions and mandates, don't forget why we are all instructed to do what we need to do. Serve a portion of gratitude - not COVID - this Thanksgiving.