How's your relationship with social media?

It was 19 years ago when I trained for my first Ironman. I was 23 years old. I knew about the Ironman from the NBC coverage of the Ironman World Championship in Kona but I only knew a few people who had finished an Ironman distance triathlon. Back then, I felt alone in my Ironman journey.

In 2006, I wasn't actively involved with social media. Facebook was still in it's infancy and Instagram didn't exist.

As I was preparing for my first Ironman, I didn't find myself comparing my journey to anyone else because I had nothing and no one to compare it to. I didn't feel inclined to buy fancy gadgets or use specific nutrition products. I wasn't being "influenced" to buy certain things on social media.

After the race, I had to call my friends to let them know how I did in the race. I didn't feel any pressure before or during the race because there wasn't a way to track my performance.

Social media has become a standard part of our lives. I'm incredibly grateful for Facebook, Blogger and Instagram as each platform has allowed me to connect with others, share my passion and grow my small business.

Social media can play a positive role in life but it also carries the potential to become a stressor. It's not uncommon for people to mindlessly scroll social media and to finish feeling sad, anxious, depressed or bad about yourself.

I don't want to return to a place of no social media but I do believe that it's important to establish a healthy relationship with social media use.

If you have found yourself in an unhealthy relationship with social media, here are a few tips:

• Remove notifications and set a time frame for browsing.
• Understand your purpose when logging on to a social media platform. Be thoughtful about why you are choosing to browse, scroll or search.
• Use social media the way you want. Follow people, brands and influencers that make you feel good about yourself - or enhance your life in a positive way.
• Don't compare your life to the picture-perfect moments you see on social media. This is another reason to be selective about who you follow on social media.
• Put your mental health first. If social media is making you stressed or anxious, it may be a good idea to delete social media apps from your phone during a temporary social media breakup.

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“Remember when people had diaries and got mad when someone read them? Now they put everything online and get mad when people don’t.”

― Unknown

Societal (body image) pressures of female athletes

 

Today is International Women's Day. A day to celebrate women's achievement, raise awareness against bias, stereotypes and discrimination and to take action for equality. A day to move closer and to eventually achieve a gender equal world. 

Although every day should be an important day to celebrate women's achievements while calling out inequality, today is an important day to remind female athletes that the power to change starts from within. When you take this approach, the world is better off. 

Far too many young girls, teenagers and young adults believe that the external view of their body defines their perception of their physical self. And when a female doesn't feel good about her looks, she may be hesitant (or refuse) to participate in sports, try out for a club, join a team or lack confidence in a professional setting. Many little girls grow up idealizing certain celebrities, athletes and influencers with the idea that they must look a certain way. These girls grow up to become teenagers and then adults. Throughout life, bodies change. When a female struggles to accomplish a certain body, she can become very self-conscious and may resort to unhealthy and drastic measures. 

There's no denying that conventional mainstream media has greatly contributed to negative body image among girls and women. All over TV, movies, magazine covers and ads are females looking thin, defined and beautiful. Messages about body image are almost always shaped by the media, beauty and diet industry and claims of health and fitness. With a unified message showing how all women should appear - this creates an idealized body image. Let's not forget that most "perfect" bodies are digitally altered and filtered. If you are like most women, you have been criticized, bullied or shamed by others - or you criticize yourself - for being "too big" and not fitting the standard. 

Due to lack of representation of women who do not meet an idealized image or beauty standard, race, age or ability, it's very difficult for a women and girls to see themselves as beautiful......and normal. As a result, women and girls have unrealistic expectations of what a female body should look like and this creates feelings of low self worth and inadequacy. If we want a world with gender equality, we need to change the norms and expectations about the female body. Age, race, religion, ethnic origin, socio-cultural status, ability and identity should carry the same weight as body image when it comes to social inclusion. 

On International Women's Day, I encourage you to think about your relationship with your body. 

• When do you feel most dissatisfied with your body? 
• Where did your toxic attitudes about your body and negative self-talk come from (and when did they begin)? 
• Who taught you to hate your body? 
• Who taught you to love your body? 
• What changes do you make with your diet/exercise routine when you feel "off" in your skin? 
• Why do you feel great pressure to change the way that you look? 

Helping female athletes develop (and maintain) a healthy relationship with food and the body is a topic that I will always promote. I've written over 30 articles on the topic, created a program to helping female athletes unlearn toxic dieting behaviors and fix the dysfunctional relationship with food and the body that is sabotaging performance while negatively impacting mental and physical health and it's a subject matter that I discuss with all of my nutrition and coaching athletes. 

Far too many female athletes struggle with the contrast between a body that is healthy and performs well in sport and a body that meets "social standards." While some athletes see weight loss as a means for sport improvements, many athletes adhere to rigid eating rules to look a certain way. When a female athlete has issues with how she looks, there's a good chance that this athlete will intentionally undereat and overexercise in an attempt to change her shape, size or weight....but with this comes the inability to meet energy, hormonal and nutrient needs. Food and body image become a mental stressor as health and performance deteriorate. 

There is no escaping the fact that female athletes are objectified. Glorifying unattainable standards of the body of a female athlete can negatively impact the self-esteem of women - especially young female athletes. Female athletes do not deserve to be judged, shamed and sexualized. A female athlete's looks should not override the celebration of her athletic ability.

The power of change starts from within. In a society where societal expectations and pressures on how a female body should look often drive females to diet, exercise and cosmetically change their image/shape/size, how can we move to a more gender equal world if women constantly feel the need to change to meet a standard? 

This leads me to an even more important question....

Who the heck is setting this body image standard that you feel you need to achieve?  

A set of beauty standards with the mission of achieving an ideal (or approved) shape, size, weight or appearance does not help us move toward equality. 
It's unfair and unrealistic. Far too many women are discriminated against simply for being (or not being) a certain size.

Let's stop the objectification of the female body and see every body type as an amazing piece of art. Your body is a gift and it should be celebrated and cherished. Body diversity is normal. Only when you care for your body properly, can we move closer to female body acceptance. 

The dangers of social media health advice

We live in an era where our quickest source of information comes from our finger tips. To help with this, professionals, experts, bloggers and influencers are eager to persuade you - their audience - by virtue of their outreach. With a large following, this builds credibility. Social media platforms are often used to deliver a message, promote a product or build a brand. As a result, trust is built and you can't help but be influenced by the advice of a stranger.  

While there are countless industries out there - like travel, lifestyle,  beauty, sport, fashion and photography - most people are persuaded to "follow" people who are in the nutrition/diet/wellness/fitness/health industry.

There's no denying that there is a lot hype and confusion in the media about the best diet, supplements and lifestyle strategies to achieve weight loss, change body composition, improve fitness/performance, enhance recovery and to combat aging. Far too often, this is all driven by the opportunity to make money and/or for popularity to be gained. Whether you want to admit it or not, in your naivety, you've probably been taken advantage of when it comes to 'buying' into someone's diet plan/program, supplemental line or promising claims.

It starts with the media amplifying every new diet and fitness trend out there - especially at the start of each New Year. Next comes internet "research." And then comes social media - dominated by followers, believers, celebrities and influencers.

We have a real problem on our hands. Inundated with messages reinforcing what's "good" vs. "bad", far too many people are struggling with serious mental and physical health issues after eliminating foods from the diet, exhibiting rigid behaviors around food or trying to replicate the sport nutrition strategies of another athlete. We all know an athlete who has suffered some type of endocrine, metabolic, cardiovascular, gastrointestinal, immunological or psychological dysfunction as a result of manipulating the diet for health or performance gains.

With so much attention on health and wellness, food is a fixation for many yet people are more confused than ever before. With a desire to lose weight, change body composition and improve fitness, you may not even realize that you are "following" someone who is giving unhealthy or impractical nutrition advice.

Many social media influencers do not provide credible information. This doesn't mean that they don't mean well but just because a person has hundreds of thousands of followers, this doesn't mean that he/she is a credible source of diet/nutrition/health information.

The next time you come across an "expert" in any field ask yourself the following to ensure he/she is the right person to take advice from:

• What makes this person credible to provide nutrition advice? 
• Is this person transparent? 
• Is this person truthful with advice/information? 
• Is this person consistent with advice/information?
• Does this person give information that is nutritionally sound/evidence-based?
• Does this person have sufficient education, training, the right knowledge and time to provide realistic and practical information?
• Has this individual met scientifically and medically justified criteria to provide online advice?
• Is there bias in their nutrition advice because of other interests (money/sponsors)?
• Does this person provide prescriptive advice (food related allergies, weight loss or specific health/medical conditions) or general food related advice (ex. bananas have potassium).
• Does this person have a clear and comprehensive set of disclaimers assuming that all advice and plans/programs are undertaken at your own risk?

For any individual who provides information, consults or counsels in the fields of health and wellness, there are legal and ethical limitations regarding nutrition advice. For example, in many states, it is unlawful to engage in nutrition counseling unless you are a licensed dietitian. It's the responsibility of every individual (you and the expert) to know the difference between general nutrition information about food vs. prescriptive advice and who can legally diagnose/treat/care for your health and well-being. 

It's wonderful to follow someone who is passionate about a certain topic or has built a platform around a personal journey. But when it comes to being influenced about your health, fitness and nutrition-related decisions, remind yourself that not every person is the expert that he/she appears (or claims) to be.

Stop trying to fit in - be YOU!

Throughout my teenage years, I always felt a bit like an outsider. Although I had a lot of friends in the "popular" crowd, I felt I was too unique to be part of any one group. I expressed my individuality through my words, actions and clothing. Although at times, I think I had my parents a bit worried with too much freedom to be myself, I don't think I would be who I am today without being the desire to be a little different. This desire to be different required a lot of self-confidence, which was certainly a work in progress through my teenage and adult years. As it relates to starting my own business at the age of 30, not giving up on a 6-year higher education journey (Master degree then RD credential), alongside maintaining great enjoyment for an active lifestyle for the past 25 years, I've constantly resisted the temptation to be normal - or in other words, I've boldly followed my dreams instead of choosing the safe and easy route. I never worried what other people were doing but instead, focused on my goals and dreams as my choices directly related to my happiness and quality of life. 

In our society, we posses a lot of behaviors, thoughts and actions that motive us to pursue group conformity. The feelings of not being included are not comfortable feelings. Beyond the uncomfortable feeling of not being accepted in a group, is the anxiety, depression and strong desire to fit in, which can many times detour a person from his/her own path of happiness, success and content. 

As it relates to training for an event, pursuing a new sport, trying out a new diet approach or making a big life decision, there's a good chance that you have made a decision or two in life because it was "the right thing to do" or because others were making similar choices. While there is nothing wrong with this approach if you pursue your nutrition, athletic and life endeavors in a positive and healthy way, it's easy to feel inadequate, incomplete or unhappy when the motivation to make a change or try something new/different, does not come from within.

For example, many triathletes pursue the Ironman distance triathlon because it seems like the next best thing to do in a triathlon journey. Same goes for joining an online group or a local club. But many times, that decision to do a(nother) Ironman is not as exciting as expected. Same goes for a new New Year diet plan that is touted to be easy, successful and life-changing. While it's true that trying something new can bring a new experience and perspective to life, your decisions in life should not be because "everyone else is doing it" and you feel the need to fit in. 

What makes someone else happy may not make you happy. And this is ok. Your personal journey is unique to you. If you always compare yourself to someone else, you may always feel inadequate, not good enough and not successful. 

Life moves fast. Life is short. It's easy to get distracted and to make decisions that are not well thought-out or are not from the heart. It's easy to pursue something on impulse because it appears as if everyone else is doing it and you need to go along with the crowd.

Consider what is most important to you in your life, right now. Who you are now and the decisions that you make now should come from within. Be proud of your choices in life and the direction that your life is heading.

With the help of social media, it's very easy to compare your life to others. There's a good chance that you compare your achievements to the better achievements someone else and consequently, feel defeated with a sense of failure.

Stop spending so much time and energy on what other people are doing or what they are thinking. Ignore the need to fit in and stop trying to be something/someone that you are not.

You are good enough.
You are smart enough.
Your body is good enough.
You are worthy enough.
You are strong.
You can be happy.
You can be successful. 

You are great at what you do. 

Become the person that you want to be. Each obstacle in your life is there for a reason. Your life is moving in the right direction. Stay confident in your decisions and stand behind your choices. Always surround yourself with supportive and loving people that allow you to live your life. 

Decision making with social media

As we wind down the 2015 season, I find this a great time to talk about how social media may affect your decisions over the next few months. 

First off, I'd like to share a little story. 

Nine years ago I was training for my first Ironman. I was 23 years old when I registered for IMFL and I met Karel on my birthday (when I turned 24). 

Even though I had a lot of friends who were triathletes, I didn't know a lot of people who had finished an Ironman. I was a swimmer, turned runner, turned triathlete. I knew about the history with the Kona Ironman (World Championship) but every Ironman race seemed like an extreme challenge.

Karel and my parents thought I was out of my mind for wanting to put my body through a 140.6 mile event but they still supported me. In a weird way, it was really cool to feel like I was the "only" one who was doing this crazy distance triathlon. 

Now you may be asking how this is even possible to feel alone in an Ironman journey, especially with the sport of triathlon being so popular and the Ironman distance being so iconic. 

First off, I wasn't actively involved with social media. In 2006, Facebook was still in it's infancy, I didn't blog (or know about other blogs) and the only triathlon forum that I was familiar with was Beginner Triathlete. 

Back then, I didn't find myself comparing my journey to anyone else because I had nothing to compare it to. I didn't ask myself "am I doing enough" because I didn't know any other way than to just follow my training plan (which I found on the internet for free). I didn't feel inclined to buy new wheels for my bike, new running shoes or use different nutrition products just because a professional or a top age grouper was using those products. I didn't read blogs or forums to learn how others were fueling, training or racing but instead, I gathered most of my information from books and magazines. Back then, the information was often quite simple (and repetitive) as there were few experts in the area of endurance triathlons. I didn't know of better shoes, a better bike, better nutrition or better training because I wasn't spending any energy on what other athletes were doing. 

But somehow it all worked out. 

I won my age group (18-24) by almost an hour, missed breaking 11 hours by less than a minute and qualified for Kona in my first 140.6 mile event.

I didn't wear a watch in the swim, I used a cat eye to see my speed and distance on my bike and used a HR monitor (without pace) for the run.
I didn't even have a race strategy. I just went out there with the goal of finishing. 

I still remember race week and race day like it was yesterday. I had so much confidence in myself simply because I was not focused on anyone else. I was so committed to finishing the race that I didn't feel any extra pressure from anyone else. In fact, only my close friends that frequently talked to me (face to face) knew that I was doing the race.
After the race was over, I called people to tell them the exciting news.
My boyfriend Karel still thought I was crazy for wanting to do another Ironman the next year. 

For many of us, social media is part of our life. For Trimarni, it is an integral part of our business and how we connect, educate and inspire other athletes. You probably found us through social media and we appreciate you "following" us via the Trimarni blog, instagram, twitter and Facebook pages.

Social media has it's benefits even for the every-day person as it can be motivating to see what others are doing and to share personal and professional accomplishments, birthdays and joyful occasions with others.
I love being able to connect with people, from all over the world, in less than a minute. I absolutely love pictures (and taking pictures), quotes and happy moments and I love sharing experiences with others.
Oh, and I also love funny and/or cute animal videos.
There are never too many cute animal videos.

But there is a downside to social media (Facebook, Twitter, blogs, websites, Instagram) in that it can make you feel as if you are inadequate and can affect your thoughts. As if you are not doing the right things or making good decisions. Isn't strange how social media can make some people feel as if they aren't good enough?
 You are not traveling enough, making enough money, training enough, happy enough, accomplished enough or in love enough. It may seem like everyone is having the best life/day ever and your life is no where near as exciting or rewarding.

Social media has the power to be uplifting but it also has the power to negatively affect your self-esteem and decision making. 

As you end the 2015 year, I encourage you to think about social media and how it may be positively or negatively affecting how you live, eat or train and your decisions. 

Social media is a snapshot of real life. If you have found yourself anxious, stressed or overwhelmed by the lives of other people, especially as it relates to how you train or eat, I encourage you to take a break or simplify your social media outlets. It is important that you learn how to connect with others in real-life exchanges and how to "follow" people, professionals or experts that will help you be a better person.  And always be sure that your connections and relationships with others on social media are authentic, genuine and honest.
And when you have a personal issue, problem or setback as it relates to making an important decision affecting your training or health, avoid using social media to find the answer. 
Reach out to an expert when you have a question or need help. 

Now moving forward, as it relates to your decision making around the holiday season and into the New Year, here are some topics that you may find on social media: 

-Gear 

-Diets

-Lifestyle habits

-Racing

-Training

-Sponsorships/Teams

Over the next few months, social media is going to be flooded with personal statements/photos and sponsored advertisements as to what people are trying, doing or using, relating to health, weight loss and training. You will likely hear about the following: 

-The best diet ever

-The best shoes ever

-The best bike ever

-The best lifestyle choices ever

-The best race schedule ever

-The best training plan ever

-The best team ever

For whatever reason, your "friends" on social media will boast about what they are trying (for many, likely for the first time) and their instant feedback will be shared,likely with lots of exclamation marks and bold/capitalized words, as to how much they love what they are wearing, eating or doing.
Example....
I'm trying this new diet and it's amazing!!!!!!! It's only been a day but I FEEL SO GOOD!!!

 But the question is.....

Are these changes necessary and beneficial for you? 

It is important that you do not become jealous, envious or overly interested in what other people are promoting. We must remember that over the holidays and into the New Year, social media has a tremendous amount of power in convincing you that you need to change.

Friends and followers become very interesting when they try something new but don't be fooled that you need to jump on every new fad, plan, product or gear, just because someone else is using it.
Yes, we learn a lot when people try new things but just because something is new or trendy, doesn't mean it is the best for you right now. 

As you continue to use social media to make your life better, be sure that you are not measuring your own successes by comparing your accomplishments to someone else.
You must remember that social media provides people with the opportunity to share a moment, a thought or an experience.
A snapshot of life for someone else is not your reality. 

I encourage you to become more self-aware in 2016 and now is a great time to start. It's time to stop comparing your life to others on social media, especially as it relates to your athletic journey. When was the last time you confidently said "I trust what I am doing and the decisions I am making"?

You don't need reinforcement from hundreds of "friends" on social media to confirm that you are making the right decisions. You don't need dozens or hundreds of LIKES to make you feel good about a workout or picture. If it makes you feel good, that's all that maters.
You've lived long enough to know what it feels like to make good choices that directly and positively affect your life.
By all means, please share your personal accomplishments and high moments on social media as you are likely inspiring a lot of people. But as it relates to questioning what you are doing every time you read a post/blog from someone else, this is when you need to stand up for yourself and stop doubting your personal choices that may be working for you. 

Perhaps this is more of a disclaimer than a suggestion as it is important that you use social media wisely as it has the potential to positively or negatively affect your decision making over the next few months. 

Every year, Karel and I hear about athletes who quickly change running shoes because of a professional athlete endorsement, makes an impulse purchase on race wheels or a new bike to be faster, sign up for a race because everyone is doing it (or because it is a "fast" or "easy" race) or trying a new diet fad in an effort to become leaner, a better fat burner or stronger.
Sometimes the decisions work short-term for some athletes but most of the time, these changes do not come with positive outcomes because they are not the best decisions for you. 

Choose your social media outlets wisely.
Don't let someone else make you believe that you need to change. 

Keep being inspiring and motivating with your active and healthy lifestyle.

Enjoy being you!

And thank you for reading this blog.
We appreciate you following Trimarni.