Are self-imposed barriers holding you back?

 

There's a good chance that while driving on a road trip, you've been stuck in traffic, had to follow a detour or experienced a road closed sign. When something doesn't go as expected or takes a different turn, it can be inconvenient and frustrating.  While these situations are out of your control, sometimes the obstacle in life is not something or someone else but rather, yourself. When it feels like something is holding you back, the most significant obstacle standing in the way of success and/or happiness may be yourself.  We've all been stuck in a cycle of self-sabotage, self-destruction, procrastination and self-doubt. Although the causes can vary and can be very situational, a common reason for feeling stuck is trying to always live up to societal expectations. Rather than building your life with intent, defining what a successful life means to you and making decisions based on what truly brings you joy, a set of social expectations and societal norms are constantly shaping your attitudes, beliefs, goals and values. As a result, you may find that you are constantly being held back from pursuing the best version of yourself.  Limiting beliefs are formed early in life based on our upbringing (ex. criticism from coaches, teachers or parents), experiences (ex. past failures, recognition, achievements) and societal expectations (ex. having a successful career, starting a family, being popular). These beliefs are ingrained assumptions about ourselves, others and the world that we live in and we are taught to believe that we must follow certain paths or hit certain milestones to be happy and successful.  Overcoming limiting beliefs is critical for personal growth and quality of life. Self-imposed barriers can hold you back from taking a risk to change careers, move to a different state, escape from an unhealthy relationship or try something new. You can't explore your potential (and what you can bring to society and give to others) if you don't open yourself to new opportunities.  If you feel like you are not getting the most out of your one and only life, it's time to look at some examples of how you may be living with self-imposed barriers..... I'm not....... I'm too....... I don't....... I can't...... By identifying your limiting beliefs, you can recognize patterns of fear, self-doubt or negativity. To understand if your limiting beliefs are valid, ask yourself if there is good evidence to support them. Can you challenge your limiting beliefs and replace negative talk with empowering thoughts and actions?  Don't let anyone - or yourself - get in the way of what you want to get out of life. You are capable of so much more than you give yourself credit for. For more articles, recipes, updates and tips, subscribe to our free weekly newsletter HERE.

A sense of belonging in sport

 

Does it matter if you consider yourself an exerciser or an athlete? I say yes. 

When you sign up for an athletic event, you have a responsibility to embrace your athletic identity. You don't have to be competitive against others but you should desire to challenge and better yourself. 

Because your thoughts and beliefs about yourself lead into your actions and behaviors, embracing your inner athlete means including your athletic lifestyle within your self-identity. 

Once you learn to learn to identify as an athlete, you start to behave like an athlete. You make better choices with your sleep, nutrition and lifestyle, which will likely improve your overall motivation and quality of life. 

While it's powerful to identify as an athlete, it's also important to identify as a member of a team or community. 

When you are around likeminded individuals, you feel a sense of belonging. This brings acceptance, confidence, connection, fun, motivation and accountability. Your tribe can help you find strengths, skills and abilities that you didn't know that you had. Being part of a team means being part of something that is greater than yourself. 

We all crave a sense of belonging and it's necessary for a healthy and happy life. Belonging to a group that embraces who you are (rather than needing to hide or change yourself) is important. A big part of feeling confident as an athlete is knowing that you belong. And this 'belonging' can be in a team or in a competition/race/event. 

As an athlete, you can easily destroy your confidence when you feel you don't belong. It's easy to look for reasons why you aren't good enough. 

OR, you can remind yourself of the reasons why you belong where you are.

Regardless of your experience level, you belong. You didn't improve by chance. You are doing the work and improving because you belong. 

To help build a strong case for why you belong and to help you find your tribe/community, here are a few tips: 

• You should never have to change yourself. When you try to "fit in," you may try to impress others or change yourself for the group you are around. A true sense of belonging is that those around you accept you for who you are and appreciate your authentic self. 
  
  
• Identify your core values. These are the beliefs that are most important in your life. Knowing your values can help guide your actions and help you make decisions. Your core values are what you care about the most. 
  
  
• Spending time with people is critical to help with feelings of loneliness and boredom. Your tribe should be composed of people who share mutual affection and trust for one another. Your closest support system should play a positive role in your life and happiness. 
  
  
• You can't show off your true self and be accepted if you don't know what your true self looks like. Belonging is all about feeling accepted for who you are. This acceptance starts from you accepting who you are and not feeling the need to change in order to be liked. 
  
  
• Say yes to new opportunities and experiences by maintaining a curious mindset. To grow, you must accept others for who they are. Less judgement, more acceptance.